BodyPump and Sleepwalkers

Getting 3 children ready for the day is no small feat. If you add getting ME ready in that mix, it's quite the trip. However, every Wednesday, I leap out of bed at 7am, go through the regular routine, and then head off to the gym for my 9am BodyPump class.

I am really in a love/hate relationship with this class right now. There are some mornings that I feel like if I hear the skinny, sexy instructor say "Get those booties down ladies!" one more time, I'm gonna just lose it. I just never understood why those of us who are less than ideally fit have to watch a hot chick up on a platform bend over and demonstrate the proper dead lift moves with a cheek hanging out.

For goodness' sake.

So yesterday morning was just like the others. Rush to the gym, set up my weights, and wait for Jesica (instructor) to show up and punish the class some more for the extra bon bons we got into over the weekend.

Lo and behold...what is this? Jesica looked a little rough around the edges, to be polite about it. No makeup (now, let me interject that I don't wear makeup usually, but then again I am not the hot instructor...you get the idea), short shorts and a relaxed t-shirt, hair halfway in a ponytail and the rest sticking out in every direction...bags under her eyes!

Wow.

We began the class as usual, only she kept forgetting the moves and blaming it on the fact that she is learning the new material and just got mixed up.

Mmmkkkaaayyy.

So, I somehow felt inspired to go up in my weights on this fine day. Man, I was pumping it out, lemme tell ya! I haven't done weight like that since I was a twig. Felt pretty darn good.

What came next took the class totally by surprise. Jesica is not normally a chick to complain, but apparently she needed to vent. So here we go. During the bicep track, she just blurts out, "So, I'm married to a sleepwalker." Ok. good for you. "You see, ladies, it's BAD. That's why I look like this today."

Well, that explains a few things.

So the bicep song is over, and she begins to elaborate.
"He's a great man, and we've been married for 9 years, but it's really wearing me down. Like last night, I woke up on my tummy, hanging onto the headboard, with Thomas pulling my legs. He tells me to let go and that he won't let me fall. I told him to LET ME GO! You see, people diagnosed with this sleepwalking condition will obey commands, but that's it. If you try to reason with them, they can get violent. So I commanded him to let me go and get back in bed. He crossed his arms, plopped down hard in the bed, and angrily turned over. It's like he reverts to a 2 year old when I don't allow him to play out what is going on in his head."
There was an awkward silence in the room.

Do you laugh or not?

She continued. "You see, it's a stress-induced problem. Right now, the stress is that it's tax season and he's a CPA.

(I'd be suggesting a career change for Thomas)

It has gotten so bad that there have been some nights that he has spent in the bathroom by himself. He goes in there, shuts the door behind him, and can't figure out how to get back out. The next morning, he has dark circles under his eyes from not being able to get good sleep."

Are those dark circles similar to the ones you're sportin' today sister?

So by now, the class is stunned. Truly feeling sorry for Jesica, we just chuckle and say, "Awww, you poor baby!" Honestly, I wanted to break out in full-belly laughter, but thought it inappropriate as this poor woman is spilling her guts.
There's silence in the workout room.

And that was it. No more elaboration on the subject. She apologized for looking like death made over, and we moved on to lunges.

Dreaded lunges.