Number 9

On Thursday, April 22nd, I got my 9th tattoo.

If you would have asked me 10 years ago if I'd be the type to be covered (or at least have MANY) tattoos, I would have said a big NO. I liked the idea of tats, loved looking at other peoples', but never did it cross my mind that I'd be the kind to crave them.

And just so you know, it DOES become a craving. Usually I already have another one in mind just days after getting one.

Tattoo parlors are not churches, that's for darn sure. There's always an element of "weirdness" to them. The images that pass through those doors are not for the faint at heart. In fact, there have been times when I've had to stare at the checkered tile on the floor to avoid seeing the profane images projected around me.
But that has never stopped me from seeking out a professional, well groomed, easygoing, wonderful tattoo artist. They have a job to do, and the ones I've worked with do it with panache. Impressive individuals, they are.

I believe each of my tattoos represents a time in my life:

1. The butterfly on my right shoulder blade--it's oh so tiny. It was my first, and I was 18. It marked a transition from childhood into adulthood. The pain was almost unbearable at the time, and it took 10 minutes.

2. The Playboy bunny on my lower back--I got it for my 21st birthday. There was something punkish about me then, and I was trying so hard to fit in and be "cool" that I made a BAD choice in tattoos. It was later regretted.

3. The large tribal design with a rose in the middle--this was the coverup for the Playboy bunny. Although I knew it would hurt like crazy, it was a must. I had to hide the bunny that had bothered me for years. Now since the 2 tats have become 1, I love them all the more.

4. The cross with wings on my upper back between my shoulder blades--this was done in a time of great joy. I was over-the-top in love with my Savior, and having some sort of Christian design was something I had always wanted. It is very lovely and one of my favorites.

5. My wedding ring--John and I had these tattooed on for our 10th wedding anniversary. That makes them amazingly special right there, not to mention convenient when I forget my real ring at home.

6. My violin/violin player with the verse Isaiah 38:20 on top of my left foot--Since I have played violin for over 20 years, this seemed only appropriate. The verse says, "The LORD will save me, and we will sing with stringed instruments all the days of our lives in the temple of the LORD." Fitting, no?

7. The 13 stars running down the back of my neck--these represented the 13 miles I ran to complete a 1/2 marathon in September of 2009. Not only that, the number 13 is special to me and my dad, so it's sort of a shout out to him as well. :)

8. The shamrock on my right wrist--John and I both got these in Belfast, Ireland. Who else can say they've been tattooed in another country? And it's just one more way he and I are eternally connected.

9. That brings us to the newest edition--the sparrow with cherry blossoms. I got this tattoo for many a reason, but I'll make it short and sweet. I drew my inspiration from Matthew 10:28-31, which reads, "Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather, be afraid of the One who can destroy both soul and body in hell. Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from the will of your Father. And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So don't be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows." See what I mean? That isn't the only meaning for the sparrow, but it's definitely #1. And as for the cherry blossoms, they are a symbol of femininity, and I think they are amazing and delicate.

Many will not understand the whole need to tattoo one's body. That's okay. I accept responsibility for what I do to my flesh.
Tattoos are becoming more and more accepted in today's world. That's not the reason I get them, but it certainly doesn't hurt my cause. :)

I will close this somewhat random post with a few quotes I found that seem to say exactly what I want to say, only better....

~Your body is a temple, but how long can you live in the same house before you redecorate? -- Author Unknown

~My body is a journal in a way. It's like what sailors used to do, where every tattoo meant something, a specific time in your

life when you make a mark on yourself, whether you do it yourself with a knife or with a professional tattoo artist. ---- Johnny Depp

~Show me a man with a tattoo and I'll show you a man with an interesting past. Jack London - 1883

~"It's only his outside; a man can be honest in any sort of skin."-Herman Melville-- Moby-Dick

~The world is divided into two kinds of people: those who have tattoos, and those who are afraid of people with tattoos. -- Author Unknown



~Mel

I'm Calm

To say that I've felt tumultuous lately is a huge understatement. I've decided not to swing to one extreme or the other in how I share my life in this blog. I used to be fairly guarded--only writing about my family's activities or my sweet children. Then, for a while, I decided to be super over-the-top and blab every blasted thing that went through my brain. Not such a wise idea either.

I am a real person. I have mood swings, emotional highs/lows, and drama deluxe. I can't and won't apologize for any of that. If anything I share on here can give someone something to relate to, then I feel satisfied.

Growing up, I always knew I wanted to be a mom. Baby dolls covered every square inch of my bedroom at times (well, babies, barbies, and ponies). As for dreaming big and wanting to become a doctor, lawyer, vet, or anything like that, I never did.
Getting pregnant at the age of 17, and then marrying my darling husband right away didn't fit into my plans at all. In fact, I was dead set on doing something with my athletic side--playing basketball somewhere and exploring the world.

I never got that chance.

I'm not saying here that I blame anyone but myself for the choices I made. In fact, I thank God literally every day for Caitlin. She's an amazing, wonderful, loving child. I couldn't see my life without her now. I wouldn't want to be without her. I decided that since I had already been thrown in to the "mom role," I clearly needed to continue bearing children until John and I decided enough was enough.

For the record, I would have had 4. :)

Anyway, my only identities were wife to John and mom to the 3 C's. While that's all great and wonderful, I have known I was made for more. Delving into personal training has really awakened the once dead spirit within me. Not the spirit or soul we speak of in Christianity, but the spirit---the light---the part of me that glows. I came alive in this world, and that's something I had craved for a very long time.

The way I went about presenting myself and my new found "light" was not exactly what I had planned out beforehand.

It just happened.

Thus, I was left with a struggling marriage and an unhappy life. I began to act out and rebel against everything possible.

*I accept that I'm a rebel by nature, but that can be used wisely*

My heart was fragmented. My entire being was tired.

I was hurting.

In response to the pain, I became boisterous. Loud. Ornery.

I'm here today to say I'm now calm. Cool. Collected.

My thoughts may still be random, my being worn down. Drama may raise its ugly head from time to time, but it no longer controls me. I'm unafraid to be who I was created to be.

I'm calm.

~Mel

Technology

There are days I don't want to get out of bed when the alarm demands that I do so. It's incessant beeping makes me shutter at 6:15am. A lot of times I throw things at it. Doesn't seem to phase it much, for it's on a mission. MUST MAKE MELISSA GET UP.

Humbug to technology, time, and schedules.

I remember the days when computers were...well...hard to use. They were huge, bulky, slow, and black/white. There was no Internet, no chatting, no email. Life was more simple.
These days, I sometimes feel like a slave to my computer. There is always someone to communicate with, and if phones, face-to-face interactions, or even pigeons aren't available, then one must resort to the computer. And mine fits on my lap. How ridiculous is that?!?

Absurd. That's what it is.

Speaking of phones (well, I did mention them just now, and this is my blog so I can change subjects on a whim), I would love to flush mine right down the toilet sometimes. There are days I sit at my bar in the kitchen and think, "I swear, if that phone beeps, rings, dings, vibrates, or so much as MOVES one...more...time..."
It's great to stay connected, but there comes a point where it's all just hooey. Junk. Meaningless irritations.

Boo to technology!

Naw, I'm not totally anti-technology. Just sometimes.

I'd like some peace and quiet. I'd like to be able to read a good book without interruption (but with 3 children, will that really EVER happen?!?). I want to know that the world can continue to turn even if I miss a call, text, or email. And if, by chance, I oversleep...everything will keep on keepin' on.
Alas, I know technology has its place. After all, how could I vent like this to a large group of people?!?
*deep sigh*

Yes, technology is good. I do believe, though, that it must be taken in doses. If I forget my phone in the car, refuse to Facebook for an evening (gasp! I know, I about died typing that--LOL), or even sleep through 3 snooze button pushings, all will be fine. JUST. FINE.

And I might even be able to enjoy that good book I've been dying to read. Or I could get a Kindle and....no, I didn't go there.
Peace out.

~Mel

Revamp

So I'm going to need to change a few things on this blog soon. I'm just not pleased with it.

Not the layout, just...things.

For instance, I'm going to take a poll. How many of you ACTUALLY use the links to the side to get to others' blogs from mine? If you use them at all, could you please comment and let me know how many and/or which ones? Thanks. Much appreciated.

I like the pics of my precious fam, but those may be going too. I dunno yet. I'll have to think about that one.

And I won't be doing anymore "advertising" either. If you want goat milk soap, you had better go to the link provided NOW and get some. Otherwise, you're gonna be S.O.L. Same goes for MckMama's blog and Kelly's blog.

Ok, be watching for the changes. It's a good thing, I promise.

~Mel

Certified

That's right!! After MANY long months of classes, studying, preparing, and panicking, I FINALLY PASSED the NSCA Certified Personal Trainer exam!! Seriously, folks, it's a huge weight off my shoulders. I have always had severe test anxiety, and with something this big either you get over it and do well or you never get certified. In the world of ME, this is the biggest thing to happen since giving birth.
I am now certified to train anywhere I want. For the time being, I'll stick with Carter Fitness Center and keep all other options open.
Yay for new beginnings and fun times ahead!

~Mel

Am I That Random?

Well, yes I am in fact.

Very...very...random.

This Panhandle wind is insane!! For the past 2 days, I've feared my 2nd story was going to end up in Oz. When things crackle, creak, moan, groan, and sway, that's never a good thing. I am loving the Spring weather, though. There's something awesome and amazing about thunderstorms, and I'm sure we'll see our fair share of them in the next few weeks/months. I noticed I have flowers coming up in my beds out front. Super!

My job is going great! I am enjoying meeting new people, handling things in an office-like environment again (similar to what I did at the dental office when I lived in Ft. Worth), and earning a few extra bucks for when John and I feel like splurging. Not having worked in over 6 years, I have been fairly exhausted when I get home in the evenings. One night a week I actually close the facility by myself--that's been interesting to say the least. I am fortunate enough to get to start my personal training career at Carter Fitness Center beginning in late May. I will be building my client base and trying new things, so we'll see how that goes.

John is in Phase O (zero) of OCS (Officer Candidate School) for the National Guard. He will be traveling to Austin one weekend a month until June, and then he'll spend 2 weeks in Salina, Kansas where he will actually begin OCS. At that point, it's considered Phase 1. He will continue the one weekend a month drill for about a year and a half. Then, it's on to where the good Lord takes us. He's looking at being a PA and going to school for that (on the National Guard's dime, of course) in the DFW area. Hmmmm....

John and I are in the planning stages for something exciting! Can't really reveal the details now, but I just had to share that tidbit. The anticipation of fulfilling a dream of ours is killing me! :)

Caitlin has the pleasure (and I say that with as much sarcasm as possible) of taking the TAKS test next week. That poor girl--they have drilled her to pieces. I'm certain she will do well. It's just super frustrating to us parents when our babies are stressed out to the max over a stupid test. Bleh. She is growing up so quickly. Nothing like having a full-blown preteen in the house!
See what I mean? Getting too big:Christian LOVES school. He's been doing so well! He's probably the most anal child I've ever met, so the school environment is right up his alley. He's such a little man--much more easygoing than his two dramatic sisters! Here is a pic of a cute cowboy he made for us:Now on to Caroline....my precious and ornery 3 year old. She is such a spit-fire! John and I find ourselves busting up on a regular basis at the things that come out of her mouth. Half of it probably wouldn't be as funny to everyone else around us, but believe me we are totally entertained! She is still in MDO and loving every minute of it. She is all things girly and frilly, which is totally good with me. A funny thing she did today---she apparently got a hold of markers and decided to draw some "tattoos" on her arm. I had to laugh. After all, she CALLED them her tattoos and didn't want me to remove them. John's response was, "Great. She's already wanting a full sleeve at the age of 3." Haha!! Yes! See for yourself:
And that's all I have for now. More randomness later. Peace out.

~Mel

I Have Nothing To Blog About

Life is what it is right now.

There is nothing amazing, outstanding, or special to blog about.

Sorry to be a disappointment there.

Of course, my 3 beautiful children do things on a daily basis that I would love to share with all of you, but then again that might take more effort than what I'm willing to put forth right now. They are all still very adorable and special though.

I got a job. It's fun, it pays okay, and I get time to just be me for a bit--only 3 days a week. That satisfies me for now.

My marriage has been a complete roller coaster ride for months now. I think we are finally seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. As rocky as these roads have been, one thing is certain: I have an amazing husband who deeply loves me. That's all that really matters, after all.

My High Plains (www.myhighplains.com) is hosting a contest called Show Us Your Ink. It's a contest for those of us "special" people who have tattoos. I think I'll enter. It's hard to pick just one to show though. Hmmmm....

~Mel