Play On

Violin playing is a passion of mine. I've played for over 20 years now, and I am continuing to learn new songs. I also enjoy going back through my Suzuki violin books 1-8 and trying to play each piece perfectly.

I picture myself standing in a little classroom at the Greater Southwest Music Festival. Desks are all around, yet there are only 3 people in the room---a pianist perched on a piano bench with hands ready to accompany me, the judge, and me. I nod at the pianist, and we take off down a path of notes that would seem hard to follow by most. I pianissimo and forte with ease. My bow flies wildly, yet I'm fully in control. No tape strips on my fingerboard to help with the higher notes---just my ear to guide me. I feel every note and every beat with such passion that I close my eyes and lose all need to concentrate on each individual finger movement. I've been preparing for at least 6 months for this day, and it's not over until the final vibrato fades. I'm such a perfectionist that each finger on each string must be exact. Otherwise, I feel as though I have failed. To the untrained ear, it would seem as though I complain over nothing. To me, however, there's definitely a difference. I pause for a split second as my bow lifts from the strings. I tuck my violin under my arm and take my bow.

Finito.

I then must wait for my placement. Is it 1st? Is it Outstanding?

I sometimes feel as though I've patterned my life after a Greater Southwest Music Festival...being deathly afraid of failure and attempting to be perfect. I realize now after many failed performances that all I can do is my very best. I will be accomanied by many a person, and each experience will be trying. I will take my final bow, but hopefully not until I've given my greatest performance and the music of my life has faded.

Play on...

~Mel